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Friday, May 14, 2004

Archbishop Daniel Pilarczyk of Cincinnati said he does not support barring pro-abortion politicians from receiving the sacrament. "We need to be very cautious about denying people the sacraments on the basis of what they say they believe, especially when those are political beliefs," he said.

Fascinating. Does he apply this standard to all the sacraments?

Harry: "I don't believe marriage needs to be exclusively between man and woman, or between two people, period. But I want a church wedding. Archbishop Pilarczyk says you really should be careful not to discriminate on the basis of what we believe, especially since this is a political belief."
Bill: "That's right, Harry. So, Father, will you start us out in marriage prep? We're thinking of a Christmas wedding, isn't that right, Harry?"
Harry: "That's right, Bill. Equal rights for gays, bisexuals, polyandrists, polygamists, pet-lovers and all the rest - that's our motto. By the way, will you marry us to our dog, Toto, as well? We really love him. You can't imagine how."

Holy Orders
Mary: "I believe women can be ordained. Political power needs to be shared. Archbishop, would you do the honors?"
Fr. John: "I believe priests can be married just like gay people. Political power needs to be shared. Archbishop, would you officiate at my marriage to the nun who runs my parish school? She's really a knock-out and very capable. She virtually runs the parish."

Fr. John: "If it is politically wrong to withhold Eucharist from Senator Kerry, why are we withholding it from non-Catholic politicians? We need to stop attempting to influence their votes through our intransigence on shared communion. Wouldn't you agree, Archbishop?"

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